lately i’ve been replacing my “i’m sorry”s with “thank you”s, like instead of “sorry i’m late” i’ll say “thanks for waiting for me”, or instead of “sorry for being such a mess” i’ll say “thank you for loving me and caring about me unconditionally” and it’s not only shifted the way i think and feel about myself but also improved my relationships with others who now get to receive my gratitude instead of my negativity
No is a complete sentence.
on style
for as long as i can remember my style has been eclectic. growing up in the 90s i remember looking up to girl groups as much as to hip hop culture. i feel that nowadays a good proportion of trends seem to be influenced by street culture and local subcultures instead of merely influenced by high fashion. a lot of attention is given to detail, seemingly simplistic or mainstream pieces of jewelry, hairstyles or jeans contain small, quirky details that bring small, hidden pieces of individualism to an outfit in order for a person to express their individualism and style more accurately, but often in a semi-hidden way, only so that those who know where to look are able to identify the pieces that someone is wearing as unique. on the other hand i notice a huge comeback of large 90s and early 2000s brands and brand icons featured prominently on sweaters, jackets, caps, shoes and other visible places. in these bleak times it seems fashion becomes an easy way to express oneself and many of my generation seem to resort to a romantization of their childhoods and a youthful nostalgia.
i am however amazed by the pace at which these tendencies are commercialised and turned into small businesses these days. almost anytime i find something on social media that speaks to me, and which i considered as unique, i am able to find an item with a similar style, concept or approach that is carried by one of the local shops or ‘street’ influenced instagrams or blogs that do sell a similar product. afterwards knockoffs of these items are picked up by high street stores at a pace i can barely comprehend, and it often makes me wonder if buying an ‘original’ is worth it if i can find a knock off item of relatively good quality for a good deal without having to search for it, wait for it to ship etc.
a large proportion of what i am wearing is non gender specific. since i love street and sports inspired styles i have been buying ‘men’s’ clothing for years now. this has increased now that i am working in the sportswear industry and i am still keen to get hold on ‘male’ items whenever two brands or stores produce a collaboration. over the last year i have started to notice more and more men around me to show interest in the pieces that i am wearing, but also in women’s fashion items in general. i also see that men start to pay more attention to detail in terms of fabrics, stitchings, silhouettes and labels.
i would say one of the largest influences on my style would be popular culture. this might seem self-evident and mainstream, and to a certain degree i do consider my look as heavily borrowing on mainstream staple items. on the other hand i do consider following stylists’ online every move as a mainstream act and path of influence for the people of my generation. whereas in the early 2000s i would obsess over certain pop culture magazines and would have to wait for their next issue to ship out, i am now able to access a non-stop stream of celebrity, stylist and model style tips and tricks 24/7.
for a while i lived by the resolution that my outfit should always look as if it could be worn by a film or series character. on the other hand i can obsess over certain items, including coats, scarfs and pants that i have seen on characters that i have encountered on one of my binge-watching nights and i admit i have been hunting for items i have seen on film characters, on bloggers or on random passersby. most importantly though i feel that the style of others can influence me to wear clothes that help me to love and accept my own body, and more than a particular item, i would want to strive for confidence, coolness or another character trade that such a person oozes. ultimately i feel that is what most people want out of their style; not only to project a cool, respectable, original or creative image of them onto others, but to use ‘personal style’ as a tool to convince yourself you are or can be the person you want to be.
